Identity

Identity: Mihaela Ivanovae 

As I was making my list of "identifiers" in class today, I noticed I was hesitant to write down anything that'd end up circled (circled words = malleable traits/qualities). I've long wrestled with the relationship between my core + my surface, and this exercise revealed that my battle is not yet over. However, I realized something freeing in this process. The three words I did end up circling were "photographer," "painter," and "potter;" yet I did not circle artist.

I have interacted with these mediums on varying levels + for different lengths of time, yet they have each taught me so much. I've been inspired, challenged, encouraged, and delighted by them. Though I love these mediums, I don't necessarily feel married to them. "Artist," on the other hand, is an identifier I've always known to be permanent. I think I can marry that one -- no matter what season I'm in, I'll always be an artist of some sort. But no matter how much I dive into the mediums of photographer/painting/pottery, something in me isn't ready to say that's all I'll ever do. As an artist, I want to allow myself to go through phases and welcome the unknown.

Self Discovery: Three Rivers Deep

By Bobby Neel Adams

That being said, I think the way I live is a crucial identifier, too. The book mentions how it is often difficult to blend Christianity + art, so instead we begin to live in several subcultures. As I verbalized this reality, I saw how this makes sense. It's easier; it's simple. However, I don't think this is how I want to live. Since I left "Christian" and "artist" both un-circled on my list, shouldn't I let them harmoniously make up my identity?

The three images I've added into this post are images that I've admired + resonated with in various ways for about a year now. Each of them is somehow about identity/self discovery. Something I find particularly beautiful about these is the way they each capture layers of the human experience in one cohesive stand-alone images. I want my identity to be something like these images -- layered with meaning, yet all-there as a many-dimensional piece.